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UCLA Reading Will Be Talking About Mandatory School Searches Essay Review

UCLA Reading Will Be Talking About Mandatory School Searches Essay Review

Question Description

1.Evaluate the introduction. What do you expect from the rest of the essay? What kind of context/background has the author provided for the reader? Does it seem like enough context? Has the author primarily listed a series of general claims that will need to be developed (created an outline of the essay), or has the author simply shown the problem by presenting an anecdote or an example that leads to a single claim/thesis statement? Has the author done something else entirely? Does it seem like enough set up for the rest of the essay? Too little? Too much? What has the introduction committed the author to do – to develop — in the rest of the essay? Ultimately, does the introduction give the reader a clear sense of the main issue/problem? If the introduction contains a thesis statement, evaluate it.

2.Evaluate the first body paragraph. What is its main purpose? Does it have a single purpose (good), or does it seemingly have more than one purpose vying for control (not so good)? How well does it achieve the main purpose? Is the paragraph built around a single controlling claim, or is it essentially built around an example? What is the paragraph made of? Is it essentially one claim + one example? A summary of a source? A main claim + reason(s) + evidence? What types of evidence are used? Are there any claims that would benefit from some SHOWing, from a concrete example or detail? Are there any claims that would benefit from the addition of a number or statistic? Do you have alternative or additional ideas for developing the paragraph? Any small items in need of improvement – the grammar and mechanics and style and tone – that you can mention? Anything other advice or comments to offer?

3.Evaluate the second body paragraph. What is its main purpose? Does it have a single purpose (good), or does it seemingly have more than one purpose vying for control (not so good)? How well does it achieve the main purpose? Is the paragraph built around a single controlling claim, or is it essentially built around an example? What is the paragraph made of? Is it essentially one claim + one example? A summary of a source? A main claim + reason(s) + evidence? What types of evidence are used? Are there any claims that would benefit from some SHOWing, from a concrete example or detail? Are there any claims that would benefit from the addition of a number or statistic? Do you have alternative or additional ideas for developing the paragraph? Any small items in need of improvement – the grammar and mechanics and style and tone – that you can mention? Anything other advice or comments to offer?

4.Evaluate the third body paragraph. What is its main purpose? Does it have a single purpose (good), or does it seemingly have more than one purpose vying for control (not so good)? How well does it achieve the main purpose? Is the paragraph built around a single controlling claim, or is it essentially built around an example? What is the paragraph made of? Is it essentially one claim + one example? A summary of a source? A main claim + reason(s) + evidence? What types of evidence are used? Are there any claims that would benefit from some SHOWing, from a concrete example or detail? Are there any claims that would benefit from the addition of a number or statistic? Do you have alternative or additional ideas for developing the paragraph? Any small items in need of improvement – the grammar and mechanics and style and tone – that you can mention? Anything other advice or comments to offer?

5.Evaluate the fourth body paragraph. What is its main purpose? Does it have a single purpose (good), or does it seemingly have more than one purpose vying for control (not so good)? How well does it achieve the main purpose? Is the paragraph built around a single controlling claim, or is it essentially built around an example? What is the paragraph made of? Is it essentially one claim + one example? A summary of a source? A main claim + reason(s) + evidence? What types of evidence are used? Are there any claims that would benefit from some SHOWing, from a concrete example or detail? Are there any claims that would benefit from the addition of a number or statistic? Do you have alternative or additional ideas for developing the paragraph? Any small items in need of improvement – the grammar and mechanics and style and tone – that you can mention? Anything other advice or comments to offer?

6.Evaluate the conclusion. Does it merely restate the major claims from the body of the essay, or does it offer something more? In other words, is it a summary or a conclusion? Does it close the essay with a larger significance and relevance (relative to the smaller significance of individual body paragraphs)? Does it revisit a story or detail or phrasing from the introduction to give the reader the impression of coming full circle and therefore reaching the natural end of the paper? Is the conclusion effective? Why or why not? Do you have any alternative ideas for concluding the essay? Any additions to recommend to the author? Anything other advice or comments to offer regarding this paragraph?

7.Describe and evaluate the author’s reasoning and/or organizational strategy. What reasons or line of reasoning does the author offer? WHY should we believe the author, according to the support the author has provided? Are the paragraphs arranged according to a clear and identifiable logic? If so, what is the logic? For instance, is it ordered from the strongest to the weakest argumentative point? Does it establish an existing condition/issue, then explain why it exists, then discusses its significance (a classic sequence)? If the paragraphs do not appear to be organized by a clear logic, then suggest a possible strategy for organizing the paragraphs, if you can. Does the apparent absence of an organizational logic, hurt the effectiveness of the essay, or does it work anyways?

8.Evaluate the author’s use of outside sources. Are the sources blended into the essay smoothly and skillfully? Does the author integrate the sources in a variety of ways, or does the author rely on a repetitive, robotic integration approach? Are the sources used for various purposes – providing a claim, contributing a reason, offering a piece of evidence – or does each source serve the same purpose? Does the author make use of paraphrase (good), or does the author rely solely on direct quotes? Could or should any of the quotes be converted to a paraphrase? Anything other advice or comments to offer regarding sources?

9.Does the author make any connections between the main issue/subject and unrelated (until the author made the connection) subjects such as historical or current events, philosophy, psychology, sociology, literature, scientific theories, famous quotes, and so on? If so, how well does the connection “work”?

10.Any other constructive comments to add? Any improvements to suggest regarding grammar and mechanics and style and tone? You could, and probably should, offer some comments with the “Essay Grading Rubric – General” handout in mind (find it in the “Handouts” folder on Blackboard). The Know Your Audience handout might also be instructive and help you offer useful constructive criticism.


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